Zarconianematica

A lot of my newer additions have revolved around a specific scenario, aka Soulless Soldiers.

It is a very extensive story that has been in development between me and another for the better part of forever, and as such have more or less overflowed my mind. So the entries pertaining to specific madness is all pertaining to one specific character that has stolen my heart as readily as any other poor love sick fool.

Meet Faust, an Origin of the Soldiers. And meet now, his madness, as described by his closest friend throughout eternity. You will see that the story is more than just a simple plot line, yet Faust's story is particularly close to me, as the sheer amount of struggling he does against fate, life and time is in a word, amazing.

He sold his soul to fight in a war that he had no reason to be in, all for the power to have his love back, and the promise of her soul in return for his participation. Out of this sheer dedication, he had risen fast and far as one of the most powerful of the soldiers, yet never wavered in his love for his lost wife, Ceras. His dear friend often asked him throughout the ages why he fought so hard for her, and he could only come up with one reason.

She was everything; without her, there is nothing.

His friend kept true to his word, and as the war was won, he was given his wifes soul, and a new life to live with her...

But fate is a bitch.

Not more than a year was he able to spend with his darling, and as they knew they were expecting his first son, his happiness couldnt have been more complete.... nor could it have been so completely broken, when the barrier threw him out of the world, far from his love, with no way back to her.

It was then that his madness set in so completely, that he worked tirelessly for an age to break this barrier, to have his wife back. But as immortal as he was, he forgot how time still moved for those who were not graced as he was. By the time his friend had found him again, many years later, it was too late for Ceras. She was mortal, and as such, would have succumb to aging as mortals do, and it was this that broke Faust for the final time. That he had once again failed. That once again, he was left desolate in a world that now held no meaning for him.

And so in his madness, he chose to refuse the obvious facts of life and time, and instead chose to believe she was still alive, waiting for him somewhere in the world, if only he could find her...

Such dedication to one single thought, while some believe it as madness, I see it as amazing. That one man could be so dedicated to the life of another, that his own life is nothing if but a conduit for her return.

The question lingering now is simple. Will he find her soul, and be at peace in this new life once more; or is he so far gone that not even his love would recognize him in his madness, and that peace would only find him if it were through death?

The ending is to be see through the eyes of the beholder, and as the conduits of inspiration flicker with new light, may they bring forth new life for this plight, and give this man the peace he deserves above all else-- whether it be by his happiness restored, or his life ended, so that their twin souls may wander freely in the world, together for eternity....

The die are cast. Now we wait for the threads of fate to be woven into this tapestry we have begun....

What to do?
I have tried everything from writing to reading, drawing, and even coloring
But still nothing is breaking this
Brick Wall
That is stopping me from flying....

I just want to do something
That doesn't involve staring
At the walls around me..

Any ideas?

TLDR: Im Bored.....

This is a rant, because I am bored.

So the general consensus of life is, I am Bored. And not just a normal bored, but that boredom that makes you wonder if you could jump into a pile of snow from your roof without getting hurt, or skiing down a ski slope when there's no snow. That kind of bored. The kind of bored that gets hospital bills for stupidity and you get it video taped so you can watch it out of boredom again and again and wonder why you ever decided to do such a thing.

The only upside to this entire type of boredom is motivation; I have no motivation to leave my chair to do stupid things, no matter how horribly entertaining they seem. That is the only thing saving my body and my sanity (barely) in this matter.

So I guess the big thing would be.... How do you cure this kind of disease? Can it be surgically removed, or is there a ton of therapy involved? Either way, Im sure it would be more entertaining than this.

Dont mind me really, its a rant because Im so bored, I dont know hat else to do but complain of my ever prevalent boredom. That and I wondered mildly for a second what was so entertaining about Disney movies when one is so close to dying of said boredom. I watched Hercules and thought it funny how things happened in that movie, and the loop holes they used, and even the stupidity of the entire movie, given Hercules true motives in mythology; he screwed over so many people and gods just to get a few measly apples to prove himself a god, and ended up dying anyways. Seriously. Its stupid.

And Little Mermaid. Seriously, why would a pretty fish girl wanna live on land where everything is so dry and boring? Because fish arent cool enough for you? Geez... And what is her obsession with forks? Do you think if you showed her a damned Spork that she would fly off the handle in a full blown fan girl rage quit?

Fox and the Hound. Doubtful that a fox would befriend a hound whose soul purpose in ife is to hunt foxes, and what was with that woman taking him in and then turning him loose into the wild?! Like seriously, do you think the poor thing will ever learn how to survive on its own just because it was wild when it was born? NO! It was coddled and treated like a damned prince, and just because some nasty neighbor wants to kill it, you let it loose? Like wtf?! Stupidity.

Beauty and the Beast. Seriously? Belle falls in love with the beast, and just as they figure it out, Disney decides its better if she wasnt loving an animal and changes him back to a human who's pretty? Doesnt that defeat the entire purpose of her falling in love with him in the first place? She fell in love with the beast, not the guy. Keep him a damned beast and let them have furry kids! Who knows, maybe after they get hitched, she realizes how much of a dick he is as a human and wishes he was a beats again and divorces him because hes narcissistic and a dick!

And what is with all the fairy tale endings of them riding off into the sunset? What about after? Like Snow White, she lived wih seven dwarfs and wakes up to some guy kissing her and just rides off with him? What about her little dwarf friends? Is she just gunna peace out and let them keep on digging in their mines, now that shes found someone bigger than them? Geez.... and how did that Prince even know that the girl was there? Just took a stroll out one day looking for sleeping girls to kiss and found one? Same with Sleeping Beauty. Stupidity. Id like to see an IRL version of all of this that doesnt end all happily ever after just because it says so in the damned books.

But yea, im done with my rant for now. Geez.... I think I watch too many Disney movies...

Ive decided to attempt my hand at commissions, though my style varies depending on factors, I will guarantee my best effort put forth.

I can do:

-Black and White pencil
-black and white attempt at computer shading
-basic colour (computer)
-basic colour (pencil crayon)
-line art

Im not the greatest on this site, but I am willing to put my best foot forwards for this. If you ask a commission from me, I will ask one of you, so it be fair trade~!

Doodle pages are quick and easy, so I also do those.

Info needed for Commissions:

-HAIR: length, style, possible ref, color(if needed)
-EYES: style, ref, expression default
-SIZE: thin, thick, muscled, voluptuous, ect
-CLOTHING: ref, style, basics
-and the basic background so I can incorporate my own flourish to it, since I enjoy giving the chars a true expression base.

References would be greatly appreciated, even if its 'use this body form, with longer hair' or the likes. Anything is better than nothing, unless your ~02321 and I know almost every single one of your characters.

Thanks all~! I guess message me a commission or what not, Im not exactly sure how to go about this.

Turns out, patience does bring you good things, in this case a SCANNER! So now I can start putting up my arts and as an added bonus I plan on starting to attempt my hand at some comics! They wont be extravagant as I dont have any skill in photo coloring and digital colouring such things, all my drawings are simply pencil drawn and possibly pencil crayon coloured...

but still.

HURRAH FOR SCANNER!!